Do I keep tormenting you with my blog post titles? Heh. It’s payback for the emails/questions/facebook messages/phone calls/etc. asking “When is the baby coming?” Believe me, no one wants to know more than me! And if you don’t already know this… no one (not doctors, not diviners, not fortune tellers, not moms-to-be) knows the answer to that question.
I suppose it is better than, “Oh! You’re still pregnant!!” Which is something else I’m hearing frequently these days.
But seriously – I think somehow someone managed to inform our little one of the recent ridiculously-cold-weather snap here in Beijing. It is just about unbearable. Yesterday afternoon, with the 25mph biting wind whipping around, it felt like -2 degrees fahrenheit! Today is no different. No wonder this babe is staying put.
And lest you feel the urge to regale me with stories of how cold it is where you live, let me remind you that in this little village, nearly everyone either walks or rides a bike or a scooter. It isn’t just the cold; it is the exposure to it that makes it unbearable.
Enough with the complaining.
Thank you for your comments and emails on my last post… they were all encouraging (in different ways) and reassuring to know that I’m not the only one who feels this way. I’d rather be transparent any day of the week than pasting on a fake happy smile. And I appreciate that when I’m real and vulnerable, people don’t respond in harshness and judgement. Sometimes I brace myself for it, but it never happens… you guys are the best.
Someone sent me a link to this blog post yesterday… it’s something I wrote earlier this month, but I didn’t know it was being submitted to the LWB blog, so I didn’t know it was on there. It’s about Robert’s Glimmer of Hope. If you aren’t already, will you join me in praying this little guy into a family?
I had a doctor’s appointment yesterday. Ultrasound showed healthy baby and healthy fluid levels and healthy everything else… so they want me to keep waiting. I’m actually thankful that in this country that’s a bit c-section-happy, I have such an “all natural” medical team. But, there’s another part of me that really wants to take advantage of modern medicine and get the show on the road. Right now, Jacob and I just feel like we need to wait – so we’re taking their advice and doing our best to be patient. (I don’t think it’s that hard for Jacob to be patient since he’s not the one with a bowling ball sitting on his pelvis.)
With all the “gearing up for baby” we’ve been doing, I haven’t had a lot of time to dwell on the fact that in a little more than a month, we will be leaving China. I’m both excited and sad. Very bittersweet. (And scary, but that’s a post for another day.) For the last few days, I’ve been trying to soak up everything around me so I never forget. Here are some things I’ve contemplated so far. There’s more, I’m sure. You may not find this interesting… it’s mostly for my own chronicle so that someday I can look back and remember.
Things I’ll miss:
-The daily walks around our apartment complex; seeing friends we’ve made along the way.
– The older people out walking backwards, playing ping pong, dancing, playing frisbee, and just generally staying unbelievably active.
– People calling our dog “Ler Ler” – sounds odd, I know. But it is a Beijing accent, and it’s endearing and cute to us. (Her name is actually LeLe, as in LuhLuh – means Happy Happy; which fits her.) Anyway, she is a village mutt, after all… not a high-browed pedigree, so Jacob and I have taken to calling our dog this rural Beiing-hua version of her name… so much so that it has almost morphed into her all-the-time-name. Can you imagine the odd looks we’ll get in the states if people hear us calling our dog “Ler Ler?” (That was a bit of a digression. sorry.)
– The old man in the park with his sword who does elaborate exercise dances. He looks as if he’s from another dynasty.
– Neighbors who have truly welcomed us… the call I got on Christmas night from an older lady in our apartment complex just to wish me a Merry Christmas. (A holiday she doesn’t actually celebrate.)
– Friends who stop by and spend afternoons just chatting. The way that everyone is chipping in to help us through the next month of our life. Friends have arranged to prepare meals, walk our dog, help us pack, run errands, and just about anything else that we might need. We may not have family around, but we’re surrounded by an incredible community.
– Stopping by the foster home play room whenever I want to cuddle, laugh, and play. I love those kids. That’s all I have to say about that.
– People who have loved and welcomed us into their lives, even when we’re the “crazy foreigners” who can barely communicate with them… People like Deng Jie, the head seamstress for Scarlet Threads, who tells me every time she sees me that she is going to miss me when I go. I’ll miss them, too.
Things I will not miss:
-The dirt. Oh. The dirt. Piles and piles all over our village, which is in a perpetual state of deconstruction/construction.
-The trash. The burning trash. The piled trash. The ever-present trash.
-The sad-looking stray animals living in the trash.
-The pollution. (Officially called “crazy bad” by US embassy.)
-The traffic. (Officially tied with Mexico City for “world’s worst.”)
-The winter weather. Did I mention it is cold?